Why have a schedule?

A very close friend of mine just called a few minutes ago. She mentioned that I had not blogged recently and she wondered if I was feeling okay.

I am recuperating from my surgery quite well. The pain has lessened and I have been able to cut back a little bit on my pain medicine. (I do need it though for my exercises.) My range of motion leaves a lot to be desired. I am working hard and gaining little by little, but have a long ways to go.

I thought I would share a few of the things we have been learning in our Wonderfully Made Moms Bible Study.

Firstly we learned that in order to get our life in order, we need to have time with the Lord every day. Without His strength, we can not make it. Secondly, we need to have a good relationship with our husband. Thirdly, we must learn how to manage our time when we have children so that we can still find a little bit of time for ourselves. If we can not find this time, we can easily become exhausted and depressed, and sometimes, physically ill.

A few years before I met my husband, I spent a few days with my brother and sister-in-law who had just had their third child. While she was in the hospital, I cared for their two daughters. I was amazed at how difficult it was to keep two little girls clean, fed and happy and still keep other necessary things done. When my sister-in-law came home, I learned a valuable lesson from her. She had her children on a strict schedule. The girls had a time to get up, a time to play, a time to go outside, a time for snacks, a time for meals, a time for a nap, a time for family activities in the evening, and a time for bedtime. According to Ecclesiastes 3, there is a time for everything.

When my first child was born, I attempted to put him on a schedule. He was colicky so this was not possible at first. But it was such a priority, that as soon as I was able to do so, he was on a schedule. And so were all my children born after him. Fortunately, my first baby was the only one who was colicky.

By putting our children on a schedule, we can also find time for our husbands and yes, believe it or not, time for ourselves. Now I know this can't work for everybody, especially for parents of some children with special needs. But too many times I've seen parents too busy doing unnecessary running around and making too many exceptions to the schedule. We need to have priorities.

I gave an assignment to the mothers in our group. I asked them to take the letters of the word SCHEDULE and, using each letter, find a word that would describe what positive things there could be for our children (and us) by putting them on a schedule. I came up with the following:

S = He has SECURITY

C = He is CHALLENGED

H = He is a HELPER

E = He is EASIER to get along with (because he knows what is expected of him)

D = He will DO more of what I ask of him

U = He will UNDERSTAND what is expected of him

L = A schedule will make LIFE easier for all of us

E = We will ENJOY him more

Can you come up with more? If so, either leave a comment or e-mail me at beyondtheclouds@sbcglobal.net I will blog your answers soon. Also, for some of you Moms who have your child(ren) on a schedule, let me know some of the positive results you see.

Sharing with Others

Recently I ran into someone I have known for several years. She is one who has gone through many, many physical trials and had some painful surgeries. She never complains and always gives God the glory for everything. She likes to be upbeat and positive all the time and she does a wonderful job of it.

When I got home, I began to think about her situation. I know some people who never seem to complain and are wonderful examples of trusting God and accepting what He allows in their lives. I have great admiration for them. But I also believe that there are times that we need to share the difficult things--the times that we are down in the valley. There are so many hurting people out there, and they need to know that others have gone through or are going through the same thing that they are facing.

This last February I was asked to speak at a workshop. It was for people who have a ministry with those who have special needs. As I was speaking, I noticed a couple sitting to my right in the second row. They had tears in their eyes. Afterwards I found out that a statement I had made had really encouraged them. I simply shared that special needs ministry was a very difficult ministry and many times it was also a slow-growing ministry. I also shared some of the obstacles and heartaches through which my husband and I had gone. Afterwards they told me how they had felt the same way and many times had felt like giving up, but that it was so encouraging to hear how someone else had gone through something so similar.

Afterwards, others thanked me and told me how they related to what I had said.

We can encourage people by sharing the hurt we are facing or have faced. It is wonderful to give our testimony to others about what God has done and is doing for and through us. But sometimes we fail to tell about the difficult things--the pain, the sorrow, the discouragement, and that oh, so alone, feeling, How about you? Think about those who have been the most encouragement to you throughout your life. Was it someone that seemingly lived a wonderful Christian life and even in times of trials and trouble always seemed to be positive? Or was it someone who was willing to share the whole truth--of being down in the valley--and how God took them up to the mountain?

Matthew

It's been a long time since I've written anything about our little grandchild, Matthew. He is the precious gift God gave our family. Our son and daughter-in-law adopted him from China last December. He was 16 months old at the time. I'll never forget the first time he came to our house. It was Christmas Eve and they had been home with him only a few days.

His new mom (our daughter-in-law) carried him into the house. He was half asleep. Because of the time change, it was difficult for him to wake up. When he did, he was very withdrawn.

At the beginning, he had attachment issues. This meant that to him everybody was the same. There was a process where his parents had to ask other people not to hold him so that he would become attached to his mommy and daddy. They were told that for him to fully attach to them would take the same amount of time that he was in the orphanage--16 months.

Well, he has been a part of the Evans family for nine months now. Has he attached to his mommy and daddy? Oh yes!! He adores his parents. To watch him and our son and daughter-in-law, it is hard to believe that he has ever been with anyone but them.

Chet and Phyllis have been so sweet about bringing me flowers since my surgery. Yesterday they stopped by to bring me more beautiful flowers. (I'm getting spoiled.) Matthew walked in with the flowers and handed them to me. It was the most special thing.

When Matthew comes to our home, he walks straight to the train table that we have for the grandchildren. He loves Thomas. When he gets tired with that, he takes someones hand and heads for the front closet where all the toys are kept. He is very much at home and very much our grandchild.

Matthew has the sweetest smile. When he smiles, the whole room lights up! Who knew adoption could be so wonderful? Thank you Heavenly Father!

Pain, Pain and More Pain

Friday night after brushing my teeth, I happily walked into our bedroom announcing to my husband, "Guess what? I flossed my teeth." Now that might not seem like a big deal, but to me it was. It means that I am getting more range of motion.

Yesterday I was able to put on some mascara. Yahoo!

But none of this comes without pain. And I do mean pain!

Last Wednesday when I went to therapy, the therapist turned my arm every which way possible-over and over and over. I am here to tell you that I would rather go through labor ten times than to have to go through that once. But there is much more to come. I get through it by taking deep breaths and talking to God.

Yes, I had heard how horribly painful surgery on the rotatar cuff was. But for me the surgery was a piece of cake. It is actually the therapy that hurts! It is almost constant pain--the pain that makes a person feel like giving up. You know what I say. This too shall pass.

The therapist said that I am making good progress!

Onward and upward I go! Maybe I will be able to pluck my eyebrows soon!!

Therapy Begins

Just a quick post to thank everyone for praying for me. The surgery went well with very little pain afterwards. Then therapy began---and so did the pain. But this too shall pass. Please keep praying for me. God is answering!

Surgery on Friday

Tomorrow I have surgery. My shoulder has been so painful that I know it must be done. Yesterday I found out that my insurance plan will only cover 5-10% of everything. This is VERY, VERY scary! I know many of you have heard my story, but here it goes again.

Four and a half years ago my husband and I decided to step out in faith and to prove God. I quit my job so that I could write the book that God had laid on my heart. The drawback would be that once my husband retired, I would no longer have medical insurance, but if I stayed at my job, I could have coverage there. We felt so strongly that God was leading me to come back home, so that's the decision we made.

Now is the time for the testing of that faith! Only it all happened a year and a half sooner than we expected. Not only was my husband laid off in February, but we could no longer get Cobra because the company went bankrupt. When I went to purchase my own policy, I was denied because I am diabetic. So I got a plan that basically offers a discount for medical services and pays an allotted amount for doctor visits, etc. It would have met my needs if it had not been for this shoulder problem...

For those of you who have gone without insurance, for the first time in my life, I can understand how devastating this can be. It is a horrible feeling! But I do have my own insurance company--and that is the Lord. Oh how wonderful to know that I do not have to worry about how this is going to be taken care of. My God owns everything! Certainly He can take care of my bills! The bottom line is that I can either fret and worry or I can put it in God's hands.

I am still human. I have my moments where fear overtakes me and then I must tell God I am sorry and I give it back to Him. More and more I am able to just leave it with Him.

I would like to encourage any of you who are going through a time where you just need to trust God and step out in faith--do it! God wants us to trust Him and He rewards us when we have faith. Remember the verse in Matthew, chapter 17, verse 20 where Jesus says, "...If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."

I covet your prayers. Also please remember to pray for Don and Trent as they attend to me and do the things around our home that I usually do.

It will probably be a while before I post again. For the Moms in the Wonderfully Made Moms group, I will be praying for each of you and hope to be teaching again by October.

Torn Rotator Cuff

The diagnosis is in. My rotator cuff is torn. I have two complete tears and one partial one that will all need to be repaired by surgery.

My doctor warned me (as if I didn't already know it) that this is an extremely painful surgery with a long recovery time. But it needs to be done. Of course I have a choice, but I have already lost quite a bit of range of motion and it will only get worse without surgery. If that isn't bad enough, I will need around 3-4 months of physical therapy.

I believe, and so does my doctor, that this rotator cuff problem is a result of last November's car accident when I was rear ended. It is going to be hard to prove though, so in the meantime, my medical insurance will have to pay. My coverage is not the greatest, and there is nothing available for physical therapy.

We have been trying to sell our camper for some time. If we sell it, the money would be just about the amount we need for physical therapy. God always supplies our needs. I know He will again, just as He has in the past. As much as I dread going through this, it will be exciting to see how God intervenes.

Pray for Don and Trent, too, that they don't kill each other during this time. I'm just kidding, but of course, not only will they be taking care of me, but they will also be doing all the things that I usually do. It's not going to be easy for any of us.

I don't want this to sound like I'm complaining. I'm really not. I am grateful to God that we live in a day and age where something like this can be repaired. He is so good to us! I am so glad that I am saved and know that I am on my way to heaven. Last week when Trent and I were in the car and he was listening to a Christian CD, he said, "Mom, God is so good to us!" I replied, "You're right Trent. He sure is!"